Test Time

I don't really know anyone who enjoys taking tests. When I was in high school I always did better if I crammed for the test right before class. Everything was fresh on my mind and I could remember answers much easier. So you can imagine my displeasure if I walked into class to find out we were having a Pop Quiz! The fear and panic that would overcome me would make my stomach draw up in knots. I hated them! I would be on pins and needles until I found out my grade. Oh, I can remember those days so easily! I can honestly say this today though...tests in high school were much easier than the tests God will put you through to develop your character and to make you everything He wants you to be. I had a Pop Quiz this week at work. I wasn't prepared...but I should have been. That's what happens when you haven't spent a lot of time "studying" like you should...do you know what I mean?! You just can't cram for a God test! You pass those tests by spending a lot of time in His Word and learning Who He is. I didn't fail my test but I don't think I made a very good grade...not the grade I would have liked. I'd say I passed with a C+. To begin with I didn't respond the way I should have. But I think I scored high on the bonus question at the end: What did you learn from this test? I learned that even if I am right and I am being punished unjustly while those around me are the ones in the wrong, I should not lash back out. I learned that any attack against me is not a physical attack but a spiritual attack. The Bible says that "we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against the principalities of darkness." The people who are involved were just puppets on the devil's strings that he used to strike out against me. I also learned that I cannot justify retaliation when My Lord and Savior was silent before His accusers. He was crucified yet did no wrong. I have now shared in His suffering. I can now relate a little more to the weight my Savior carried. Yet I've not even scratched the surface of the real pain He suffered or the heartbreak He felt...that even I was to blame for. Though I was hurt, angry and upset, I was not innocent. But Jesus was. Through the revelation He gave me just today, the burden and weight I carried has been lifted. My attitude has changed. And through that, even the very atmosphere that I have struggled to endure is not the same. The ones who attacked are now cordial and even speaking to me again. I know and believe the shift came about with the simple revelation He gave me and the change in myself and my attitude. It's difficult to learn these lessons the hard way. But if He can find me faithful to the end regardless of what I must suffer, endure or go through, then I will have passed! That is my heart's desire: to be found faithful and that lives would be changed in the process. Father, I thank You for loving me enough to chastise me when I was in the wrong. Thank You for revealing the meaning behind this test and opening my eyes to the spiritual side. Thank You Father that You still find me worthy enough to break me to pieces and throw me in the fire again until You can see a spotless reflection in me. Your love never fails to amaze me. I love You!