Friday, August 5, 2011

Happy 3rd Birthday Ava!


It’s so hard to believe that another year has gone by…and yes, this will be a constant starter line to Ava’s birthday blog entry for years to come!  
Three years ago today, a precious gift was placed in my arms and my life was eternally changed.  Inasmuch as I can hardly remember what life was like without her, I can hardly believe how much 3 years can feel like 3 days because it has gone by so fast.  
Those first 8 weeks of sleepless nights felt like an eternity and I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d ever have a full night’s rest again.  Fast forward to the present and my mind races to capture every moment in the in between as I grasp the revelation that time is fleeting ever so quickly away.  Chubby cheeks, chubby arms, chubby legs that could hardly crawl have developed into, well…she still has chubby cheeks but her arms and legs have slimmed down and she’s gone from looking like a baby, a toddler to looking like a little girl and my heart melts.  Her baby gibberish has been replaced by a fully understandable vocabulary that is, at times, annoying, but ever so much more heart warming and hilarious!  
In the last couple of weeks she’s learned how to write the letter “A” and recognizes it in EVERYTHING and proudly declares, “Mommy, that’s MY name!”  I just agree, for a full explanation that it is merely the letter IN her name will begin a cute debate of “No, its not” and “Yes, it is.”  I’m learning to pick my battles wisely for the sake of not expelling too much oxygen….I will need a good supply when the next tantrum comes my way.  :o)  
She’s grown so much and surpassed many milestones in the last 12 months.  Potty training was, by far, the most challenging parenting moment thus far.  I’m proud to say that she was fully and officially potty trained over the 4th of July weekend…and we all shouted and clapped and I, exhaustedly, brushed the back of my hand across my forward with relief!  I sought much advice from parents of toddlers and the recurring advice was, “she’ll do it when she’s ready” and “One day it will just click.”  Guess what!  One day, it just clicked!!!  I really thought there would be more to it than that but there wasn’t.  This new “big girl” status is bittersweet; no more diapers, no more baby….Be still time - I’m still trying to embrace each day, each moment.
As I’ve watched my beautiful little girl’s personality develop, God has been stirring my heart to understand the depth of the responsibility He’s given Jordan and I as her parents.  My heart is overwhelmed to think that God had this precious little life that He wanted to send into the earth with a purpose.  He spanned the globe in search of the perfect parents for her.  In choosing us, I believe, He thought to Himself, “The gifts, abilities, talents and calling I have placed on this life can be nurtured, pruned, awakened, strengthened, and encouraged by Jordan and Christy Williamson.  They will recognize her gifts and her call and they will teach her and equip her in ways that will bring every plan I have for her to fruition.”  I’m not saying that to brag as if we are some great parents.  Trust me, I’m learning as I go and I truly believe, if you have children of your own, God thought the same thing about you.  I’m saying that because what God has been revealing to me in the past few weeks is immeasurably humbling and I feel the weight of the responsibility He has placed on us.  We are not parents to simply provide food, clothing and shelter for our children.  God had a much greater plan for us.  Our children are the hands and feet of Jesus in this dark world just as much as we, currently, are supposed to be the hands and feet of Jesus today.  If Jesus tarries and we pass from this earth, our children will be left to carry the flame.  Will they know who Jesus is?  Will they know their purpose in this life?  Will they use everything God’s placed inside of them to further the kingdom of God?  Will they fulfill His call for their lives?  It’s our responsibility to raise them up to know Him and teach them to trust Him with their lives wholeheartedly.  “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” – Luke 12:48.  Because God has been dropping this revelation in my heart and in my spirit, I am held even more accountable now.  I want to look back over my life one day and know that I loved my Jesus with everything within me and I taught Ava and my future children to love Him and to serve Him all the days of their lives.  To invest into my children is the highest calling I have first and foremost.  When I stand before Jesus, I want to hear Him say, “Well done.”  I believe I have lives yet to touch myself but I believe Ava and my children will touch even more lives than me.  Everything God’s placed within me I want to invest into my children.  I’m filled to be emptied.  It’s said “you can’t take anything with you when you go”.  Today, I reflect on that not only referencing material possessions but also the truths, wisdom, knowledge and experiences we’ve had along life’s journey.  
I want Ava to know:
- Jesus is faithful in the darkest of days.  
- Jesus can be trusted when there is no one else who seems trustworthy.  
- She can experience the love of her heavenly Father and abide in His love every single day.  
- She can do ALL things through Christ and that He will be her shield and defense. 
- When life’s storms are raging all around her, I want her to find peace in knowing, personally, the One who whispers, “Peace, be still.”  
- I want her to live with an understanding that people will let her down and sometimes fail but when her foundation is built on Jesus Christ, she can never be shaken because He cannot and will not fail.  
- I want her to face everything head on because she is confident that Jesus Christ is for her and He wants good things for her.  
- She will be successful at everything she puts her hands to because God’s favor will rest on her.  
All the lessons we’ve learned through our own experiences, our own tests and trials, I want her to know because through them all God was preparing us and equipping us.  It’s been a part of the process and it’s never been easy but it’s always been worth it.  She will have her own trials and tests but through them all she can face them boldly because she will know what they produce in the end.  I want her to know how much she is loved by her daddy and me.  Loved SO MUCH!
Thank you, Lord, for the gift of Ava in our lives.  Daily give us the grace and wisdom we need to raise her in the way You desire so that she is fully equipped for the plan you have for her.  I thank You that she is full of personality, determined, sweet, compassionate, funny, smart and the most incredible little person on the planet!  We are so in love with her and so blessed that You chose us to be her mommy and daddy.  
Happy 3rd Birthday my sweet Ava! 

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Happy Father's Day

I know it’s been ages since I blogged last. I always have such good intentions of blogging on a regular basis but when our schedules get jam packed, it’s really difficult to find the time to tap into my creative writing niche. When I write, I like to put thought into what I have to share and that takes some quiet time, which is extremely rare with a two and a half year old running around; therefore, blogging, writing, creative thinking is foreign in my world most days.

As Father’s Day is approaching, albeit in a mere three days (no, this has not snuck up on me in any way! Insert deep sigh), I have been in deep thought on gift ideas for Jordan. I’m a thoughtful, sentimental, gift giver. What gift can I give to Jordan that will honor him as the amazing daddy he is to our sweet Ava? I searched online for Father’s Day crafts that Ava could do; nothing. A Hallmark card? Too expensive. Clothes? Thoughtless. Coffee cup? Redundant. So, what? A blog post? Yes! It would be thoughtful and well within budget. Smile. Don’t worry. He’ll get an actual gift too. I’m still thinking about that one though!

Having grown up most of my life with an alcoholic father that left our family often, I had dreams of the kind of father my future husband would be to our children one day. Jordan not only has been the fulfillment of those dreams but has exceeded every possible expectation imaginable.

I love when he gets giddy about waking Ava up some mornings. He is, seriously, as excited as a kid asking if they can have ice cream for dessert or a kid being told they’re going to Disney World! You’ve seen those commercials, right? Well, that’s Jordan in those moments. For Ava, daddy encompasses every aspect of the word “fun”. She giggles contagiously as daddy sings silly songs to her or tickles her while rolling around in the floor. I am, equally, as excited as she when we hear his key in the door as he comes home from work. Ava stops whatever she’s doing and screams, “Daddy! Daddy’s here!” Then she bolts for the front door and he can’t put his laptop bag down fast enough to scoop her up into his arms.

There are many times I sit and watch their times together and I bubble over inside with humble gratitude that God sent me a man who would be the daddy to my daughter that I had always dreamt of having myself. I marvel at the times we sit and discuss parenting; the challenges, our hopes, our expectations, our dreams for Ava (and future children). Hearing his heart for raising Ava to know Jesus and speaking so much life into her, even at this young age, is such a tremendous blessing in my life. In these moments he makes this wife and mother feel more secure than anything in the world.

Jordan is instilling in her that she is Jesus’ Princess and she is Daddy’s Princess and I know this is something he will continue to instill in her from now until her wedding day…one day…a long, long, long, long time from now!! I can hear him at night as he tucks her into bed asking her this same question, “Are you Jesus’ Princess? Are you Daddy’s Princess?” And my heart melts as she bashfully whispers “Uh huh”. She will know her worth and know how deeply she is loved every day of her life and will never have to search for that love and acceptance from any one else. And as I continue to eavesdrop on their bedtime routine, I hear them break out into the silliest rendition of Jesus Loves Me that you can imagine. They’re singing off-key as loudly as they possibly can. This is, immediately, followed by a spontaneous burst of tickling by daddy and an eruption of hysterical cackles from Ava. Soft gentle prayers follow to bring a sweet peace and stillness back in her room; goodnight hugs and kisses, sweet dream wishes and lights are out. Unforgettable moments engraved in my heart.

Jordan, I honor you this Father’s Day for not only being such an amazing daddy, but also for being understanding, forgiving, gracious, a loving husband, my best friend, encourager, confidante and man of God. You stir up a desire within me to be a better person, to love deeply, to chase dreams, to believe in the impossible. I’m so thankful that during the darkest season of our lives, in the midst of not knowing God’s plan in that season, we clung to each other, we sought God’s heart together and together we believed that God was faithful and together we have discovered His new plan and direction for our lives. An amazing journey lies before us and there is no one else that I would rather travel this path with than you. I love that you are a part of my life and I love doing this life with you. Thank you for who you are as my husband and for being such an incredible daddy. I don’t believe I’ve ever seen a daughter so in love with her daddy as Ava. My heart is full and I am blessed. When baby number two, three, four or however many God blesses us with comes, I know you will still be just as amazing with them as you are with Ava. I love and adore you. Happy Father’s Day! xoxoxoxox